Captain Negaduck and the "Disney Afternoon" Villains
Neverland is a small island and one the sea was a lonely pirate ship and we hear singing going on there. We zoom in on the ship and see various "Disney Afternoon" villains set up a flag of the Jolly Roger on the mast. "Disney Afternoon" Villains: Oh a scoundrel's life is a wonderful life A-rovin' over the sea Give me a career as an animated villain It's the life of a scoundrel for me Oh, the life of a scoundrel for me Some villains are playing with darts on a picture of a crude drawing of Negaduck on a door. "Disney Afternoon" Villains: Oh, a scoundrel's life is a wonderful life They never bury your bones For when it's all over A jolly sea rover drops in on his friend Robotnik Just about then, the door opened and two figures came out. One of them was a slender dark gray woozle with light gray markings at his stomach, chest, muzzle, and bottom of his tail, yellow eyes, a black nose and eyebrows, a snaggletooth, and purple bags under his eyes, wearing a red cap, a matching bow tie with white polka dots, a yellow vest, blue pants, and black shoes. He is also topless. His name was Stan Woozle. The other figure was an obese orange heffalump with yellow markings at his stomach, chest, and mouth, a loose tooth, a black tuft on his tail and eyebrows, and a burnt orange square patch on his right knee, wearing only a black vest. He is also topless, pantless, and barefoot. His name was Heff Heffalump, Stan's partner in crime. Stan, Heff, and "Disney Afternoon" Villains: Oh, my good friend Robotnik "Good morning, ship mates." Stan and Heff said in unison only to get caught by Taurus Bulba. "And what's good about it, Stan and Heff?" asked Taurus Bulba. "Here we are collecting barnacles on this miserable island!" Steelbeak said. "While his nibs plays ring-around-the rosy with Master Crane." Hoof said sticking his gun at Heff. "Look out there. Might go off!" Heff panicked, but he and Stan got their necks in rope knots by Flygirl. "We ought to be tending to the business of looting ships." Flygirl said. "Why, I've almost forgotten how to slit a throat." Fat Cat said, using his dagger and got Stan and Heff free. "Better drop it." Professor Moliarty said as they all threw daggers at the stairs as Stan and Heff tried to avoid them. "And tell the captain we want to put to sea, boys!" Steelbeak said. All the villains laughed as Stan and Heff stuck out their tongues and walked away. An evil version of Darkwing Duck with wearing a red turtleneck shirt, a yellow coat with black buttons, a black mask, and a matching cape with a red color inside was looking at a map. He is Negaduck. He had one of his hands cut off by Crane and now has a silver hook and now he want revenge. "Blast that Master Crane!" Negaduck snarled. "If I could only find his hideout, I'd trap him in his lair. But where is it?" He starts to look at the map "Mermaid lagoon? No, we searched that. We've combed Cannibal Cove. But here!" He stuck his silver hook at the far north west on the map but then groaned "No, no, no, no. That's Alley Cat territ… But wait…" he took a good closer at the map "Those street cats know this island better than I do me own ship. Ah, I wonder…" At that moment, Stan and Heff walked in. "Good morning, captain." "I'VE GOT IT!" Negaduck cheered as he grabbed Stan and Heff with his hook pulled them closer. "Hello Kitty, Stan and Heff!" "H-H-Hello K-K-Kitty, boss?" Stan asked, very afraid. "Scat Cat's niece!" Cat R. Waul said, "She'll know where Crane is hiding." "B-B-But-But will she talk, boss?" asked Heff as Negaduck let go. "Oh, a little persuasion might be in order. Now let me see. Boiling in oil? Uh, keelhauling? Marooning?" Negaduck said as he thought as a female duck named Ample Grime was singing horribly with her accordion. Ample Grime: Oh, a scoundrel's life Is a wonderful life You'll find adventure and sport But live every minute For all that is in it The life of a scoundrel is short Oh, the life Having enough of her singing, Negaduck got out a gun and aimed it. As Stan and Heff got the shaving pack ready, the shot was heard and Stan and Heff heard a accordion fall and splashed in the water. Stan took a look only to get splashed in the face. Heff laughed at this, thinking it was funny. Negaduck put away his gun. "Now let me see, where was I?" asked Negaduck. "Oh dear, dear, dear boss. Shooting a gal in the middle of her cadenza? It ain't good form, you know." Stan said. "Good form, Stan?" asked Negaduck in a smooth voice first, and then yell angrily as he pushed the table aside and approached Stan and Heff and waving his hook. "BLAST GOOD FORM! DID CRANE SHOW GOOD FORM WHEN HE DID THIS TO ME?!" "Why boss, cutting your hand off was only a childish prank you might say." Heff said as he removed Negaduck's cape. "Aye, but throwing it to Ben Ali Gator! That cursed beast liked the taste of me so well he's followed me ever since licking his chops for the rest of me!" Negaduck said loudly at first and then said in a low voice as he sat down in the chair which Stan brought. "And he's had you by now, boss, if he hadn't swallowed that alarm clock. But now when he's about, he warns you, as you might say with his tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock." Stan said. Speaking off tick-tock, there was a sound of tick-tocking heard. Stan, Heff, and Negaduck heard it. Negaduck's face was in fear. There below his ship was a slender green American alligator with a purple feather and red cape named Ben Ali Gator. "Well, what do we have here, now?" Ben Ali said, "It's the delicious, yummy Negaduck. I'm going to eat him!" When he saw Negaduck, the alligator licked his mouth, hungry for a duck. Negaduck screamed. "STAN! HEFF!" He screamed as he leapt into Heff's arms "Oh, save me, Stan! Please don't let him get me, Heff! Please! Don't let him get me, Stan! Heff!" He hid behind a chair while Stan and Heff went to Ben Ali. "Here now, shame on you, upsetting the poor captain." Heff scolded, "There'll be no handouts today." "Oh, come on, Stan and Heff!" Ben Ali pleaded, "May I please eat Negaduck just one bite?" "No," replied Stan. And Heff said, "Shoo now, shoo. Go on, go on. Off with you, I say. Go away. Go away, out of here!" And as they said that, Ben Ali went away. "Oh, well!" he sighed, "I'll eat him next time." Negaduck appeared from behind the sheet of the chair. "I-I-Is he gone, Stan and Heff?" he said in a scared voice. "Aye, Boss. All clear. Nothing to worry about." Heff said as he tried to relax his shaking captain. "Oh, Stan, Heff. I can't stand it any longer. I tell you I can't!" Negaduck said as Heff sat him down on the chair. "Now, now, now, Captain, just relax. What you need is a shave, a nice soothing shave. There now" Heff said as he put a towel around Negaduck's head. The duck sighed. A seagull saw the towel and sat on it and fell asleep as Stan and Heff sang. Stan and Heff: A heffalump and woozle's life is a wonderful life a-sailing over the seas Give us a career as buc… Heff didn't see that he was putting shaving cream on the seagull's bottom. "Captain, you know, I can't help noticing you just aunt been your usual jolly self of late." Stan picked up a razor and wiped it on a towel. Stan and Heff: Give us a career as buccaneers… "And the crew's getting? a might uneasy, Captain. That is, what's left of it. Hmm." Heff was using the razor on the seagull's bottom and it wiped out her feathers. "Now why don't we put to sea, see? Leave Neverland. Forget Master Crane. There now!" he put some aftershave on the seagull's bottom. The seagull woke up and in horror, flew away covering her behind. Stan and Heff didn't see her go because they was putting some powder on their hands. Stan and Heff: Give us a career as buccaneers… "We'll all be a lot happier," Stan smiled. "Not to mention a lot healthier. Oh!" He and Heff put their hands out only to find out they were doing it in mid air. "Captain?" cried Stan and Heff in unison. "Oh dear!" said a worried Stan, "Neither one of us has ever shaved him this close before." Neither one ever dared to look, so Heff didn't to look for it under the chair. "Don't worry captain," he said, "It must be somewhere about." He began to walk off with the chair carrying him. The towel fell from Negaduck's face and he looked down to see Heff making a fool of himself crawling to find something. "Get up, you hose-nosed creep!" Negaduck snapped. "Aye, aye, sir!" Heff said knocking the chair and Negaduck to one side of the ship. He and Stan turned around to see him dazed. "Oh, we found it, boss." Stan cheered, "Good as new." He and Heff tried to pull his head off only for Negaduck to wake up very angry. "Why, you honey-breathed bubblebrains!" Negaduck cried, as he held Stan and Heff by their necks and was about to kill them when… "Master Crane, ahoy!" Wacky Weasel called from the watcher. "What? What? Where away?" Negaduck asked. "Three points off the starboard bow!" Fat Cat called. Negaduck looked through his telescope and saw Crane with Viper, Pixie, and Dixie. "Swoggle me eyes, it is Crane! Headed this way with his girlfriend and the twins! Stan and Heff, pipe up the crew!" "Aye, aye, sir! Pipe up the crew! Pipe up the crew! All hands on deck!" Stan and Heff said in unison as Heff whistled "All hands on deck! All hands on deck! All hands on deck!" All the pirates rose up and got into action. "Look alive, you swabs! We've got him this time, Stan and Heff!" He said as he put his black cape back on. "That we have, captain." Negaduck called to his henchmen. "Man the Long Tom, you bilge rats!" He went to Stan and Heff and put on his red fedora with a black rim band. "I've waited years for this." "That's not counting the holidays, either." Stan said. "Double the powder and shorten the fuse!" Negaduck ordered as Hotshot and Flygirl got the cannon ready. "Double the powder and shorten the fuse!" Heff repeated. "A pretty sight, Stan and Heff. Like sitting ducks. All right, men! Range: 42!" Negaduck said as he used his telescope to pin point Crane, Viper, Pixie, and Dixie on a cloud viewing Neverland. "Range: 42!" Stan and Heff said. "Elevation: 65!" Negaduck ordered as Stan and Heff repeated after him. "Three degrees west!" Stan and Heff repeated again. "Steady now!" This time, neither Stan nor Heff repeated. Stan covered his head with his cap and covered his ears while Heff covered his ears and shut his eyes real tight. "Steady!" Category:Fan Fiction